National Diabetes Awareness Month: Can I SCREAM??? (Am I allowed to scream?)

**Another repost from the archives.

Not much has changed when it comes to dealing with insurance
 and my child's diabetic supply needs.

This was originally posted in September of 2009 when I was still

very green in the area of handling orders and insurance!"**

So yesterday morning, I realized that I only had 10 syringes left for Ashlyn.

Since we use a minimum for 4 syringes a day, 

I thought I hadn't better wait anymore.

It has been a couple weeks since I was finally able

 to send off all our new prescriptions that were for a 90-day supply

 to this new mail order company through our insurance.

I had no idea how much longer I would have to wait for it to arrive in the mail,

 so I thought I'd better call in my prescription to the pharmacy 

and go over there and pick some up.

So when I get there, the nice pharmacy girl tells me that

my prescription can't be filled because it looked to her

 (according to her computer screen)

that I or somebody else had already had 

the syringe prescription filled for the month....

6 days earlier. 

 No, I informed her, but I suspected that meant

that the 90-day supply had indeed been filled, 

we just hadn't received it yet.

Because neither of us had any idea when that shipment would actually

arrive at my house, she decided to call my insurance company to get "an override".

It took her two calls to finally get the answer that was confusing to both of us,

 "You can't get an override from us, you have to get it from them."

"From who?" I asked.

"Ummmm, I'm not sure," was her answer.

At this point, I was thinking, "Didn't you ask them specifically who I had to call? Am I going to have to do this myself?"

Another nice pharmacy girl jumped in at that point and said,

 "Did you ask for an override? They'll give you the override if you ask for it."

"Yes, I did," replied the first pharmacy girl.

"Gimme that phone," was the second pharmacy girl's response as she yanked the phone from the first (now it didn't really happen that way, although I wish in my mind it would have!!).

Again, I wait while the second set of phone calls are made to my insurance.

The second nice pharmacy girl gets off the phone and as she is walking away to her work she says over her shoulder,  

"You can't get an override on that prescription, you'll have to pay for it out-of-pocket."

Let me just say, that at this moment, my head about started to spin on my shoulders!!

I had had a previous experience where the insurance was a big pain in the tail, 

and you can read about that here.

I didn't want to repeat that whole stupid experience, 

so I chose to just go with what she said,

pay the $2.50/bag of syringes myself, 

and keep hoping that mail order shipment would

be in the mail when I got home.

(It was at this moment that I found out that my bank card was not in my purse and I had no cash on me so I had to go back home where I found the card in my husband's wallet, but that's for another time also....)

The shipment actually arrived today. 

 We were very excited because with this order 

we were to receive the pen needles which would allow us to finally

be able to start using the insulin pen.

 I will talk about that more at length in another post, 

but just know that it is something new and different 

and we've been waiting for nearly 3 months

to get this thing going.

So, this package arrives and it has everything in it we could possible need for the next 90 days.....

except the pen needles.

Let me just say that it took me a minute to regain my composure

 before I got on the phone AGAIN with these people.

The man on the other line was very nice and sympathetic, and very helpful.

He looked at his computer and asked,

 "Have you had this prescription (for the pen needles) filled before?"

"Of course not," I said, "or else I wouldn't be calling you."

(Again, no I didn't really answer that way, but I wished I could have.....I just said no.)

"Could you hold for a minute while I make a call, 

because I think I see the problem here."

So he too had to make a call to somebody I didn't care who,

 and I was put on hold for approximately 5 minutes

 before he came back with an answer for me.

He proceeds to tell me (in "Reader's Digest" format as he put it) that insurance doesn't generally

allow for two different medication delivery systems, 

and because we had received our syringes, 

they weren't going to process the pen needles.

He was very sympathetic and said he wished they wouldn't make such a broad, sweeping

policy without taking into consideration the diabetic because of the hassles

it causes those of us who have to live with it.

Of course he manually overrode this and noted it

 so we wouldn't have any further problem with it,

 and he put a one-day expedited shipment on it. 

 Of course, we won't receive it until next Tuesday or Wednesday now, 

because this all happens to us on a FRIDAY

before the Monday HOLIDAY!!

I do appreciate that our insurance provides so much for us 

(which I will go into at length in a future post also), 

and they have many, many people to handle with a myriad of illnesses.

But it's just a documented fact that diabetics who are insulin dependent just HAVE to

HAVE their supplies. 

 So why, oh why, is it not just automatically put into the systems

 to flag our cases so this kind of thing doesn't have to happen.

 Why aren't the overrides automatic?

It makes me feel like the insurance people don't trust us,

 and assume we're trying to abuse

the things they provide for us that we need to keep our CHILD ALIVE.

Why do I have to get permission to get more insulin? 

 Why do I have to get permission to get the supplies to start 

a more efficient level of care for my daughter? 

 Don't insurance companies

want to help us PREVENT life threatening emergencies that would send us

to the ER and cost THEM a ton of money??

It doesn't make sense......it makes me want to........well, you know.....

I trust you.....you can read the title of this post.

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Cost (of the Diagnosis)

**So, this post was originally published on September 7, 2009!
And I was worried about ObamaCare THEN!!
Our costs for our daughter's supplies have changed several times in the last few years,

as my husband's insurance has changed every. single. June since 2009!
Her insulin needs have DRAMATICALLY increased 
so we have to get more insulin every month as well.
So thankful that, at this moment in time, we have good insurance through my husband's job.

I do NOT take it for granted!  So. grateful!***

When learning that our Ashlyn was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, some genuinely concerned and caring people have asked us: "How much does it cost you?" So I thought I would share with you some concrete numbers to help raise awareness about this long-term disease, it's management, and the cost involved. Let me just say at the get-go that I am so very thankful that my husband's job provides us with really terrific health insurance. You better believe that we're concerned with all the noise coming from Washington about this new health care reform. It truly frightens me to think that we might lose the excellent care we have available to our daughter and how that good care has helped her recover so well from when she was initially diagnosed, and that in the future if she has a life threatening emergency that care might not be available as quickly as she might need. With that being said, let's talk numbers. After some weird delays, we've finally received the final bill for Ashlyn's hospital stay back in February when she was initially diagnosed. She was admitted on February 11, and we were discharged on Friday night, February 13th. The total bill for those 3 days, 2 nights: $14,202.50. Thankfully, our health insurance covered the majority of that and we will owe just $3711.51. Not exactly pocket change for us, but never-the-less, better than the first amount.

We had to take a basic Diabetic 101 (education) class a couple weeks after that which cost $775.00. Again, insurance covered the majority of that, and we had only to pay $162. There was one other class we took in June to learn the ratios which will cost us less than $20, thanks to insurance again. Have I mentioned to you how grateful I am that my husband has a job and that his job offers insurance?

Ashlyn has to have insulin every day, 4 times a day, and this requires quite a bit of medical equipment. I remember sitting in the pediatrician's office when we first were diagnosed before we rushed off to the hospital, and our pediatrician saying that this is a "very equipment heavy" disease. It really is. At times, it seems ridiculous how much stuff you have to have with you AT ALL TIMES for the "just in case." When we were discharged, we were given an entire 8 x 10" sheet of paper full of prescriptions for what she needs. We started out getting everything in one month supplies until we could get it all figured out to get the 90-day supplies for everything. The 90-day supply requires a separate prescription, and has to be sent through the mail initially. Now that we're in the system, we can just refill her prescriptions through the website and have her supplies shipped automatically to us. The 90-day supply costs a little more at the outset, but in the long-run saves you money. Here's how everything breaks down for our family:

This is a picture of our 90-day supply of Lantus Insulin, Humalog Insulin, One Touch Ultra Test
Strips (for the glucose meter not pictured here), One Touch Ultrasoft Lancets (for pricking her finger), and the Ketostix (which you use to test her urine for ketones when she's sick or has
high blood sugar readings), and the syringes.

I asked our pharmacy (Kroger...might be different at other pharmacies) for the cash price (what we would pay out-of-pocket if we had no insurance) for each of the above items:

Lantus Insulin - $117.49 (we need one a month)
Humalog Insulin - $118.89 (one a month)
Test Strips - $215.98 (for two boxes which last a month)
BD Syringes - $38.99 (for one month's supply of 150)
Lancets - $12.99 (box of 100)
Ketostix - $14.99

Thankfully, we have insurance that covers every penny of all her supplies and we pay only a co-pay for the insulins. So our total out-of-pocket expense for Ashlyn's supplies is the $50 for two bottles of insulin.

With the mail order 90-day supply it's even cheaper. We received everything in the picture above and paid nothing but the $100 for 3-months worth of insulin for the two insulins. So instead of paying $25/month per insulin, we're only paying $16.66.

Just FYI: there are some other items you need to have around too that you get without a prescription:

The red container is for safely disposing of the syringes which is less than 3 bucks at Costco, and the rest of the things are less than $10 all together. The glucose meters (we have two: one for home and one for the take-along bag) were both given to us at the hospital.

Now this puppy does actually need a prescription because we use it to save Ashlyn's life. It's our "Glucagon Kit".

You have this on hand in case of severe low blood sugar which causes seizures. You have to give this to her to keep her alive until the ambulance gets there.
Out-of-pocket: $248.49 (shelf life of a year)
Our co-pay cost: $40.00

Again, we are so thankful to have the privilege of having good insurance. It does not get by us that other folks do not have insurance at all, and have to pay these prices or need lots of help
to get their supplies. We thank the Lord for this blessing in our life.

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Frustrations and Fears (of the Diagnosis)

**Continuing to repost some journal entries from back in 2009 when our daughter was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes.***


This last week has been one of the most troubling since
Ashlyn's diagnosis in February. [originally written in the summer of 2009}

One of the things that I knew was going to be so difficult for our family
was keeping track of all the stuff you need to care for someone
with Type 1 Diabetes.
So when we got home from the hospital, one of the first things that I did, was find a container for all the extra supplies we would want to keep on hand, as well, as something nice, for the things we would be using every day.
I call them the "Extra" supplies and the "Working" supplies.
I also put together a bag of supplies and things we needed to take every time we go out
the door in case of emergencies. In that bag, as well as the "working supplies" basket we have a glucose meter. I was so thankful that we were given two meters, because it is so much easier not to have to remember to grab the meter from the kitchen when we're trying to run out the door.
Well, the week before this last one, we lost our kitchen meter.
We've begun to slip a little in our routine somewhat, 
so the meter doesn't always get put back
into the basket as soon as we're done with it, like we used to do at first.

So we tear the house apart looking for it, and I'm getting more frantic as time goes on.
We have another one, so it's not an emergency, but I was frustrated that we would be down to one meter,
 and the one we lost had a couple important things with it that I really didn't
want to lose or have to replace.
Besides, a meter isn't teeny tiny so I couldn't figure out how we could lose something
like that.
We did eventually find it under the couch (which I had shoved back in an effort
to find it, but it was stuck to the corner leg so it didn't come out from under the first time we looked), and that was a relief to me.
THEN, on Father's Day, we lost a vial of insulin. 
 On Father's Day....Sunday.
Again, we tore the house apart and went through the trash twice.
I had to step back from this one because I thought I might lose my mind
over how we kept losing such vital things. Why does this keep happening?

I've tried so hard to be organized and get us all in a routine, and developing good habits so we WOULDN'T lose these things!!!!
As the time kept on clicking away and we weren't finding this, it began to become an emergency as Ashlyn needed to eat and have her insulin.
So I call the endocrinologist on call (remember this is a Sunday NIGHT now)
and he said he would call in a prescription to another pharmacy for us because our regular pharmacy was closed at this time.
So when I get over to the pharmacy I have to give them all the information for Ashlyn and I wait for the prescription to be filled.

Needless to say, an HOUR later I still didn't have the insulin in hand.
Our insurance wouldn't cover the new vial because I had just picked up a new one the previous Friday evening, and our prescription is for one vial a month. It was too soon to pick it up, come back on July 12th. 
 ARE YOU CRAZY???
So, at 9:30 pm on a Sunday night, I'm told to find numbers to our insurance to get an "emergency override" to cover a loss of medication. Do you know how difficult it is to reach a live person on a Sunday NIGHT?? I could NOT believe that there was this much red tape to cut through to get the medication that my daughter needed to stay ALIVE!!!
 I sent up a "flare prayer to the Lord to help us!!!
Fortunately, the pharmacist saw the problem and finally took matters into her own hand.
Kudos to CVS because this lady told me it was "unethical for her to let an 8-year old go without her insulin"!!
 She got somebody on the phone and played like she didn't know why the doctor called in an emergency prescription for us, but that it must be legit.
So instead of paying $109 out-of-pocket, I walked out of there at 10 pm with our insulin and only the $25 co-pay!!! Praise the Lord!!!

By Tuesday of this week, we encountered another problem we were warned about......
ILLNESS.
For the first time since her diagnosis, Ashlyn has been really, horribly sick.
She acquired "gingivostomatitis" from a younger sibling which started with a very high fever and malaise.
So I'm checking her blood sugars and her ketones every couple hours,
 and pushing the fluids.
Within a couple days, she develops the canker sores in her mouth and stops eating all together. There is NOTHING she can eat without pain.

As time goes on, I'm starting to feel a bit of panic because I'm worried about her getting enough carbs, and all the what if's involved with illness and diabetes.
So I'm on the phone, facebook, and in the pharmacy trying to find something, anything, to relieve her pain. The doctors say it's a virus and there is nothing to treat it, but I don't have much to go on in the way of comfort measures except for Tylenol and crafts that take the edge off for about 4 hours. 
 I find something called "Pink Magic Mouthwash" but notice that after a day or so of this, her teeth and tongue have black something on them. I went back to CVS yesterday and talked to another pharmacist, who was so helpful and understanding, and directed me to some mouthwash called Biotene.

Oh, the relief I felt when I saw her face light UP when she first cautiously poured this into her mouth!! It has given her some measure of relief
 though certainly hasn't minimized the problem. 
 Today, she is worse. 
 More canker sores, more pain, more aimless roaming around the house with a look of exhaustion and weariness in her eyes.
The only thing she seems to like in her mouth is 7-up. 
 So that is where her carbs are coming from for the most part. 
 She can barely tolerate popsicles, frozen go-gurt yogurt, fudge pops, applesauce, ice cream, etc. 
 Soup is okay, but not enough carbs.
I just want her pain to go away.
 She has enough to endure on a daily basis ANYWAY. 
This is about to put her and me over-the-edge. 
 We're back on the phone tomorrow with the
pediatrician and possibly the dentist (as she can't even look at a toothbrush!) to see what
they might have to offer. 

"I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say on the Lord." Psalm 27: 13,14 (KJV)

"When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee....For I am the Lord thy God.....thy Saviour.." Isaiah 43: 2,3 (KJV)

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Management Techniques (of the Diagnosis)

**Continuing to revisit some archived posts that I wrote when our second child was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes in 2009.***
(Wow.  How we've changed our eating plan since then!)
This particular eating plan is very old-school and restrictive, 
but was very useful in training Ashlyn and our family in how
managing your carb intake controls blood sugars.
We eventually moved on to a carb/insulin ratio plan which taught
us the freedom of eating more of what we wanted when we wanted,
but came along with learning that with freedom comes the
necessity for discipline.
Moderation is the key!!!


Okay, so here is where the fun part comes in! Because we have several other children I was concerned how Ashlyn's dietary needs would affect them. We have the normal mealtime challenges that all families have with children, and I didn't want them exacerbated because of the things Ashlyn needs to eat. I didn't want to hear, "Why does SHE get that and I don't?" (complete with the high-pitched whine) Ashlyn also needs to have snacks 3 times per day, which I knew would be delightful to the rest of the children as that meant they would get something too. The only trick there is that Ashlyn can't have more than 15 carbs per snack. So, we've been trying out new foods and snacks that would fit in with Ashlyn's needs as a diabetic, along with keeping the rest of the family cheerful and cooperative, as well as not breaking our budget!! So here are a few things we've come up with: (Oh, and let me insert a disclaimer right here. I realize that almost all of these examples are pre-packaged, convenience type foods. But what a huge challenge to figure out the carbs in most home-made snacks. As I continue to experiment with fresh, healthier foods, I will post those things as well. But for the first time here, I wanted to show the things that travel well, and you can have on hand to grab quickly.)

Here are a few of our favorite "free" foods. A "free" food in the diabetic world is one
that has less than 5 grams of carbs in it, hence, you don't have to count those carbs. So, free. Almost all proteins are free foods, so we've learned to love cheese sticks and hard-boiled eggs. We cannot keep the sugar-free frozen popsicles in our house. Especially with temperatures in the 100+ range at our house now,
 these are GREAT snacks.
We've also had illness in the house, 
and these are a welcomed way to get fluid in them.




These delicious little rice-cake treats we discovered at our new favorite store, Costco.
There are 26 bags per box and you get either chocolate flavored
or a fabulous cinnamon swirl flavor. 
 Each bag has a nice size serving in them for just 16 carbs per bag,
so you feel satisfied with just one bag.
I take these along for snacks on our ride home from church!!



Microwave popcorn is one of the best snacks, because you get a half of a bag for 15 or so carbs. It's very satisfying, visually, because it looks like such a big snack compared to 6 saltine crackers.




Sugar-free pudding has only 8 carbs per 1/2 cup serving. Dollop on some cool whip
and you've got yourself a terrific snack or a dessert! My kids devour this stuff!



Here is a handy little tool for getting in some "dairy-like" beverage without using up a lot of carbs. I use it like a tool; we don't get it every day and it's very thick and filling.
Only 5 carbs per 8 ounce serving.



I found this delicious concoction in the Diabetes Forecast magazine.
2 slices of whole-grain toast
2 Tbs. fat-free cream cheese
A few strawberries sliced nicely
1 tsp. honey
Spread the cream cheese on top of toast. Top with strawberries and drizzle with honey.
49 grams of carbs. Fits nicely in Ashlyn's parameters for 50-55 carbs per meal. Can you say
DIVINE!!



Do you have any idea how many carbs are in pizza???
I didn't.
Well, it has LOTS!
So I found this brand of pizza at Costco which is a thin crust and has only
26 carbs for ONE-THIRD of a pizza!! ONE-THIRD!! That's a lot of pizza for a 9-year old!! Plus we have enough carbs left over to add in a veggie or fruit on the side!!


Enjoy!!!

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Adjustment (to the Diagnosis)

**This month I'm re-posting our experiences with our daughter when she was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes back in 2009.  This article was originally posted in June of that year.**


So here we were in the ER in February with our nearly 9 year old daughter, who had just been diagnosed with Type I Diabetes. We knew we would have to wait right along with all the other "emergencies", and man, was that tough!! I think it was then that I, as Mom, started walking through all those dreadful feelings you have to go through when you grieve the loss of something.....albeit, I didn't completely know everything I was losing.

I was pretty confident that our daughter's stay in the hospital wasn't going to be too painful for her because we already knew what she was there for. No tests, MRI's, CAT scans, or surgery to have to worry about. And how difficult could it be to give insulin shots?

It's definitely the grace of God that we are not given all the information for a particular situation we are going through all at once. I wouldn't have been able to handle it all. 
It was OVERWHELMING!!
The only information I had about Diabetes was that associated
with Type II Diabetes, typically diagnosed in adults.
What we learned is that Type I Diabetes is a completely different disease all together.
Although the care and management of Type I looks similar to Type II, 
the underlying philosophy behind it is different.

Type II is a metabolic disorder, one where your body still produces the insulin but just can't utilize it properly. You have the hope that it can be controlled or even reversed somewhat by changing your diet, losing weight, or using some medication. 
You may have to take insulin (the hormone produced by your pancreas that controls the sugar levels in your bloodstream), or you may not.

In Type 1, you have complete organ failure. Your pancreas completely stops producing insulin and will never produce it again. 
 So you will always have to take insulin to stay alive...for the rest of your life.
Here is where the loss comes in.
The loss of being able to eat what you want, when you want, and in the amounts you choose, and the times you choose!
How crazy is that for a child???
In either Type I or Type II Diabetes, you all-of-a-sudden have all these boundaries
placed around your food.
 Do you know the love affair that Americans have with their food?
(Though Diabetes is in nearly every country around the world, I'm speaking from the frame of reference of being American. I'm truly thankful that we live in America because many children DIE from this disease in other countries because of a lack of education, supplies, and access to any health care.)

So we're learning to adjust and accept.
Now, it's an issue for our family whenever there is a church fellowship time.
Most of these fun events are after the evening service on Sunday, and all of them involve
food. So we have to decide, do we all go, and hope there is something there that fits in her meal plan, or do we have some cake while she just sits there and watches us?

Do we remember to bring something so she can eat something then on top of what we've ALREADY had to bring along for her dinnertime that was just before the service? It takes an ENORMOUS amount of energy, planning, and MATH!!

What about going out to eat?
We were given tools and information to know how to maneuver such situations,
but we still have to count carbs, and give shots before the meal.
Right there in front of everybody. We could do this in the bathroom....(ewww)...or the car, but there is a time issue involved with the insulin. She needs to eat within 15 minutes of receiving the shot. Will she have her food in front of her in that amount of time?
Have you noticed that most birthday parties are not at exact meal times. They are usually like 1 or 2 in the afternoon. Sometimes at 7pm in the evening. And they always have cake and ice cream. More planning, more adjusting our meal schedules, more checking
to make sure we have all our supplies. We have forgotten to put the insulin in the bag (even though we double check to make sure all the other supplies are stocked) and had to drive an hour round trip to go get it.
 Maddening!!

Right now Ashlyn needs to have 50-55 carbohydrates per meal. 
 That is based on her weight and energy needs right now. We've learned that carbohydrates break down into sugar in your body and that is what Ashlyn cannot metabolize because she doesn't have the insulin which does that work. So we add insulin. We add the insulin (Humalog) via a syringe to "cover" the carbs she eats at meals.
Then, at bedtime she gets another kind of insulin (Lantus) that acts like a "base" insulin to cover any changes in her sugar levels throughout the day not related to food, i.e., stress, changes in outside temperature, changes in diet, exercise, etc. The insulins can't be mixed up. They must be refrigerated, and the amounts given are based on her blood glucose readings and the amount of carbs she eats.
Do you know much carbohydrate is in a peanut butter sandwich? How about a piece of birthday cake or an apple? We didn't either....but we do now. We still don't know everything and never will.....we will always be learning, counting, adjusting.
In fact, we're still in just the "kindergarten" phase (as I like to call it) of diabetic education.
We're still just giving shots based on how many carbs she eats and what her blood sugar reading was. We are soon to transition to something called "insulin-to-carb ratios". It's supposed to give us more freedom in when she eats, and the amounts she eats, but it's still complicated and lots MORE math!!

See, through all of this I have learned even more, how completely amazing the human body is.
In a normal functioning body, your pancreas can regulate just the exact amount of insulin
you need for the slightest little changes to keep everything regulated properly. It's like a thermostat. You don't have to think about it, it just happens. You don't even know how extremely awesome it is until you're without it. I'm going to put in a shameless plug here:
I still don't know how anyone who has ANYTHING to do with studying the human body can possibly believe that with all it's highly delicate intricacies and super complicated functions can honestly believe that humans HAPPENED to evolve to what we are today without an Intelligent Designer!!!!! There is just no way, even scientifically, that humans, with all
the number and variety of highly developed systems of the body could possibly have just "popped" into existence. What peace I have in knowing that my Heavenly Father (God) lovingly formed and purposefully made me and every human with a specific plan in mind.

"I will praise thee; for I am Fearfully and Wonderfully made, marvelous are thy (God's) works, and that
my soul knoweth right well.
My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought
in the lowest parts of the earth.
Thine eyes did see my substance,
yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members are written,
which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum
of them." Psalm 139:14-17 (KJV)

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Gift (of the Diagnosis)

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord.... to give you a future and a hope."
Jeremiah 29:11 (NASB)

"...our God turned the curse into a blessing."
Nehemiah 13: 2b (KJV)

"He (the Lord) hath sent me.....to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.....that He might be glorified."
Isaiah 61:1, 3 (KJV)

{This picture was taken at our big birthday bonanza two months after her diagnosis.}


About 36 hours after Ashlyn was admitted to the hospital, the full
weight of her new lifestyle started to hit her. I could tell she
was very sad, almost depressed about it, and it worried me a little.
She was experiencing a lot of pain with the IV she had to have
and it was becoming quite traumatic for her.
When the nurse came in and told us they were going to have to
replace it because it "was going bad", she became nearly inconsolable.
It took the nurse 2 tries before we both had had enough, and
and we (Mom and Dad) told the nurses that that was it for now,
and that we weren't doing this anymore until later.
I put her in a warm bath and tried soothing her as best I could,
when through tears she asked me,"Why do I have to be the one with diabetes?"

At that moment, I prayed for wisdom, and at that moment, the Lord inaudibly whispered to me, "Esther."

I began retelling her the story of Queen Esther in the Bible.
I reminded her that Queen Esther was given something in her life that she didn't necessarily want either. She was forced from her family into an ungodly situation, having to do things she most likely didn't want to do, and having to marry someone whom she didn't necessarily want to. But the Lord revealed to her that He had a plan for her. 
Through her uncle, she was encouraged to think through the fate of her people in the hands of the man she married. Her uncle asked her, "....and who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?"
The Lord used this seemingly awful situation in Esther's life, this curse, if you would, to ultimately save her people and bring glory to Him. 
I told Ashlyn that the Lord has a purpose for her in having diabetes. We don't know what that purpose is right now, but we have to trust him, like Esther did, that we'll know in His timing.I believe firmly that our Sovereign Lord designs every person with a special purpose. It is our responsibility to discover what that purpose is through prayer, the study of God's Word, and through Godly counsel.
We each have a custom designed life message that is ultimately to bring glory to Him. Every life is precious to it's Designer and every life has a purpose.
Ashlyn's diabetes is just another chapter in her life message; a gift He gave her to use for His glory.
She has a precious story to tell with all the things that happen in her life, and we just can't wait to see how God is going to use this this to point other people to Him

National Diabetes Awareness Month: The Diagnosis

Because this is "American Diabetes Month" or 
"National Diabetes Awareness Month," I'm going to be reposting the stories of how
Type 1 Diabetes has impacted our family.....particularly our now 16 year old daughter.
I began this blog just a few months after she was diagnosed in 2009.


**From the archives originally written in June 2009**

Back in February of this year (2009), we received the most life-changing news that, to date, we had ever received. We have moved several times, changed churches twice, purchased other vehicles, added children to our family, but nothing topped this!!

For quite awhile Ashlyn had been having these things happen to her that seemed rather random and without a trigger. It started a couple years ago with her having random vomiting. We couldn't pinpoint anything that caused these episodes, and the vomiting usually happened only once or twice per episode, and she would feel better soon after. Last year, in May 2008, I took her to our pediatrician to have her checked out and mentioned this, but because she seemed healthy otherwise, his only suggestion was to write things down surrounding these events to see if we could determine a pattern or trigger.

Well, within this last year, we added headaches to the mix. Sudden, severe headaches were accompanied by the vomiting almost immediately; then she would feel better. In January 2009, I was talking to our Pediatrician AGAIN about this and he thought he would want to see her before he said for sure we were looking at migraines.

I made the appointment for the following Friday but had to change it to the following Wednesday. That Friday night (we were supposed to have visited the doctor) we had a movie night at home. We had eaten ice cream sundaes before starting the movie, and it jumped out to me that Ashlyn left the room 3 times in the first 45 minutes of the movie to use the bathroom.

That night and the next day she kinda jokingly told us that she had been drinking lots and lots of water lately. Like she couldn't get enough of it. That weekend I noticed she was ALWAYS using the bathroom.....over the top. It also seemed to me that she was looking REALLY skinny. Not just growing and thinning out, but almost bordering on emaciated. By Monday she was waking up with a headache and just having this general feeling of uneasiness, no energy, laying on the couch all morning, and staying inside when everyone else was playing outside.

I'm familiar enough with what we were about to be told to know that these are textbook signs of Diabetes, so I started preparing myself for this when we saw the doctor on Wednesday.

November 2008

Her diagnosis......Type 1 Diabetes.

In retrospect, I would've called and demanded an appointment on Saturday after the movie, but I just didn't realize how serious it was.
I had no idea.
I had no idea that our pediatrician would send us to the hospital.....immediately from his office. He went to so far as to say he really didn't like the idea of us going home to get some things together. It was THAT urgent.
I had no idea what to expect my baby (who was actually almost nine) was about to go through.
I had no idea the freedom that was just snatched from her life.
I had no idea how complicated it was going to be to manage her care.
I had no idea how equipment-heavy our lives would now be.
I had no idea how we would blend this into our already rather chaotic lives.
I had no idea how she would respond to this.

This picture was taken January 19, 2009, still 3 weeks and 3 days from diagnosis.