Are you "Multilingual?"

During my journey to weight loss, I began thinking about the food we eat in America.
 I have come to realize that we all eat for different reasons.

Some far more legitimate than others, obviously, based on the soaring obesity rates we are seeing in this country.

So when I came across an article entitled:

So I stopped eating

I was intrigued.

But I found something far more profound than the story about the girl who gradually succumbed to

anorexia.

"Also, I had cried when I’d gone to kindergarten, so Mum had brought me home, ordered books, and vowed to teach me. That kind of thing was supposed to tell me she loved me, but I didn’t feel it; because to me, love was words and gifts."

Did you see that?  Did you SEE what she said?

She said that what her mother did for her in wanting to homeschool her was her mother's way of saying,

"I love you."

But she didn't get it.

The girl didn't understand.

It wasn't HER language.

Love, in her language, was "words and gifts."

I have been reviewing a book on my personal bookshelf, the bookshelf in my bedroom, entitled

The Five Love Languages.

In this book, the author lays out five "languages" of love understood by most people.

He theorizes that many communication issues between spouses are caused by not understanding how your spouse interprets your expression of love to him/her, and vice-versa.

According to the author, the 5 different languages of love are:

1. Giving of gifts

2.  Physical touch

3.  Quality time

4.  Acts of service

5. Words of Affirmation

Everyone is different.  Everybody speaks and understands their own language (naturally), 

but it takes some time and study to learn what your spouse's language is.

It's the same with our children.

My oldest daughter is a gift-giver.

She has always been the one who couldn't go to a friend's house without something to give them.

Even if she gave something of her own.

She would wrap it up and was just as excited to watch them open the gift as they were to receive it!

But if I try to tell her that I love her by guarding the types of media I let her watch,

or by washing all her clothes for her every other day,

or by protecting her from some of the humanistic philosophies that she would be exposed to in a formal school setting

and sacrificing my time and desires to homeschool her....

I'm pretty sure she would misunderstand what I was trying to communicate to her.

See, she doesn't speak my love language.

Even though she is my own child, we don't always understand each other.

It's the same in my marriage.

I need to learn to be fluent in another language.

The language of the one I chose to marry.

It's a different language than my daughter's too.

Sometimes, it's really hard to learn a new language.

Sometimes I wish we all spoke the same language so it would be easier.

But then, wouldn't that be boring?

Wouldn't that be awfully monochromatic?

Should I be resentful of someone simply because they don't speak MY language?

Shouldn't I be willing to study and communicate in the most effective way I can with those I love the most?

Isn't that what our Heavenly Father did for us?

He knew that as mortals, mere humanity, we would never be able to fully grasp the endlessness of His love for us.

That we, as simple human beings are not capable of truly comprehending Who He is?

How CAN we know if we've never seen Him or heard Him?

We have our own very finite definition of greatness, of holy things, of things that never end.

But it doesn't translate into the God of the universe, the Almighty, Elohim.

So He spoke to us in a way that we can understand.

Through the spectacular varieties of species of all animals and plants, of land forms, cloud formations,

temperatures, weather patterns, human races, languages, stars, planets, galaxies, 

and the simple complexity of the human body!

"The heavens declare the glory of God;

and the firmament shows His handiwork.

Day unto day utters speech,

and night unto night shows knowledge.

There is no speech nor language,

where their voice is not heard."

~Psalm 19:1-3

As mere finite beings, we can understand the language of creativity and of a force much

greater and wiser than ourselves to have started this marvelous world we occupy.

Yet, the Holy One knew that even some would not understand Him through the language of nature and creation.

So He wrote down His thoughts for us.
He put His thoughts into written form.

"All scripture is given by inspiration of God...."
2 Timothy 3:16


"For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction,
that through perseverance and the encouragement of Scriptures we might have hope."
Romans 15:4


"These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God,
in order that you may know that you have eternal life." 
I John 5:13


Yet, humanity would still not "get" it.
Many of the things that were written down were a mystery to those
confined to an earthly existence with earthly limitations.
And our loving Father knew we needed a visual.
We needed to be able to SEE His Word in action.
What love really looked like.
What a servant's heart really looked like.
What humility really looked like.
What grace really looked like.

So He wrapped Himself in skin.
He became one of us, so that we could understand Him in the simplest of terms.
He willingly imprisoned Himself in a human body because He wanted us to get what He was saying.

"And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us,
and we beheld His glory,
glory as of the only begotten of the Father,
full of grace 
and truth."
John 1:14


"For God so loved the world,
that He gave His only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish
but have everlasting life.
For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world;
but that the world through him might be saved."
John 3:16,17


Don't my children deserve what my Heavenly Father has extended to me?
To understand my love for them?
Shouldn't I be willing to keep trying over and over
until they get it?
Shouldn't I try to reach them in the most effective way possible?
Am I willing to learn THEIR love language?

Been busy!!

Since Thanksgiving the time seems to have sped up and I can hardly sit down to do anything, much less journal out our days or a few thoughts here and there.

These special holidays are always so much fun and full of meaning,

but I almost dread how busy we become with activities to attend,

sights to see,

treats to be baked and prepared,

the lovely sounds to be heard,

the driving here and there,

the laundry that still accumulates,

the schooling that needs to be planned and purposefully DONE,

the groceries that still need to be shopped for and stored,

the packages that must be sent,

the library books that need returning,

the carbs that must be counted and medicated for.

It can all get overwhelming.

It's seems the antithesis of what we're even celebrating.

The quiet, and peaceful stillness of a newborn.

So we've been spending our last few days creating some serene, peaceful spaces filled

with the beauty that is Christmas.

We've been "decking" our halls......

......and turning the lights down low in the evening.

We've pulled out all the glorious music that fills our home with the stories of the birth of Christ

 that fill us with the wonder of the Divine King of Glory coming to earth in bodily form as a tiny baby.

We light fragrant candles that add wonderful aroma to the rooms and remind us that everything

we do should be as a fragrance ascending to the Holy One.  

We're preparing our gifts to give to those who have meant so much to us this year

 (and some for many, many years).

Children need to learn how to give of themselves,

and how to give from their heart.

So we spend many hours making little gifts that don't cost us much monetarily,

but require a sacrifice of our time and the use of our God-given creativity.

Here's a sneak peek:

Most of our children are ministering to others and serving the Lord through 

the special presentations of the choirs they participate in at our church.

We've also been spending time together enjoying the sights and sounds of this season.

Tonight was the annual Christmas parade in our little town.

What does your family do every year to build fun memories together and to teach your children

what Christmas is really about?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving for children: Ideas

Since our national holiday of Thanksgiving is right around the corner, I've been thinking about different ways I can teach my children about this most lovely time!!  Not only in ways that we can celebrate the roots it has in our national history and some of the founding events in our country, but also in the state of mind in which we live everyday!!
As a parent who has been given 6 delightful lives to nurture and guide in Biblical values and truths, I want my children to learn how to live always in a thankful mindset.  In scripture we are told that it is God's will for us to be thankful in everything we experience.....good times and bad.

"In everything give thanks:

for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

1 Thessalonians 5:18

This verse certainly gives no limitations on when we are to be expressing thanksgiving to our Lord, so even though we certainly do verbalize things we are thankful for at this time in November, I want my children to learn that we should be thanking Him ALL the time!!

But practically, how do we do this?  How do I teach my children to be thankful for EVERYTHING?  For the things that are good in our lives, as well as the things that are uncomfortable or, dare I say, downright ugly?

For one thing, I think it takes practice.  Naturally, we are grumblers and complainers.  I know I am anyway.

It takes a conscious effort on our part, a disciplined mind, to praise the Lord in difficult times.

"Enter into His gates with thanksgiving,

and (enter) into his courts with praise.

Be thankful unto Him,

and bless His name.

(Why?)

(1.)  For the Lord is good.

(2.) His mercy is everlasting.

(3). His truth endureth to all generations."

~Psalm 100:4,5

My children are memorizing this entire Psalm this month, and I think it's significant to point out to my babes that no where in this scripture are we commanded to thank the Lord for the circumstances around us or the material possessions we have.  Our focus is to be on the attributes of our Heavenly Father.  We can always find something to praise Him for because we know that God never changes.  He is always good.  His truth never changes.  His mercy to us is "new every morning!"

Another way I can teach my children to be thankful is to learn to see things the way our Heavenly Father sees things.  We don't always understand why things happen to us that we may perceive as being "bad".  But scripture tells us:

"And we know that all things work together for good

to them that love God,

to them who are the called according to his purpose."

~Romans 8:28

I want my children to understand that even though we don't know the outcome, our Heavenly Father has the blueprint of our life that He is following, and that sometimes we have sorrowful, or painful, or hard times to teach us to trust Him more, or for a purpose that we may not even be aware of yet.  We are told to just be thankful.  Even if we don't understand.....even when it seems illogical...we must trust Him.

Finally, I want to teach my children to write things down!!  Write out everyday something you can be thankful for!!    Two of my favorite ideas are found at :

"The Most Important Day of the Year"

and

"Make a Thankful Tree."

"And let the peace of God rule in your hearts,

to the which also ye are called in one body;

and be ye thankful."

~Colossians 3:15

Saturdays are for: Visiting with precious friends!!

This precious couple has been friends of our family for years.

When I think back over the years of knowing them,

 what has always stood out about them is their love for children.

They have been foster parents, he has been a history teacher in tough public high schools,

and she was always my "craft lady" for Vacation Bible School.

Their generosity to our family alone is incredible.

They have blessed us over and over.

The sweet boy between them is the son of one of their adopted daughters.

They are now raising him.

Today, we helped them celebrate his 4th year of life.

And what a celebration it was!!

We all went hoping to be a blessing to them, to play with this little guy, to delight him with a gift,

and express our admiration to them for the daunting task they have so willingly taken upon themselves.

But guess who ended up being blessed the most?

 Of course, it was us!!

Again, their generosity to us was very humbling, and my children

were very touched that THEY were the ones who came away with gifts and so much love.

The journey: Getting Started

That's such a lame title.

Maybe, as time goes on, I'll think of something a little more descriptive.

What I DO know is that I don't want this to be all about me.

Over the course of this year, I have learned so much about how SO MUCH is not about ME!

I write the following information strictly for the curious.

Since the beginning of this year, I have run into people I haven't seen for awhile and here is the first reaction:

"Wow!!  You've lost weight!"

The second statement that ALWAYS follows is this:

"How did you do it?"

So I quickly want to answer that question before I move onto what I actually gained this year!

When I decided that I was GOING to lose weight, I knew I was going to need a plan.

Something outlined in map formation.

With little goals along the way that would help me reach my ultimate goal of losing 45 pounds.

But I did not want to spend a lot of money on this.

I didn't want to buy any exercise equipment:

1. I don't have space in my crowded house for something like that.

2.  I don't know one. single. person who has purchased a piece of exercise equipment who didn't end up moving it out onto the patio for storage or just selling the thing. 

3.  I didn't want to get involved in something I would not want to continue once I reached my goal.

I didn't want to go out and spend a fortune on a gym membership,

or for a fancy, shmancy set of tennis shoes and matching workout clothes.

I didn't want to get involved in some kind of fad diet that you grow so secure in that you don't

learn how to change your lifestyle on your own for lasting weight loss.

No pills (what are you learning about yourself when you pop a pill?).

No weight watchers (great group, but not for me, 

hard to maintain unless you keep going to the support groups).

No pre-packaged meals sent to my house (too expensive, processed food, how are you learning portion control yourself when they do it for you?).

No cleanses or flushing of the bowels for this chick!!

I remembered that when we were sitting in the hospital with Ashlyn when she was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes nearly 2 years ago, that our "Diabetic Educator" handed us a book

that you take everywhere you go that has nearly every restaurant in the country listed

along with every entrée that restaurant offers.  Then they have the calories and carbs listed so you

can figure out how much insulin you need with your meal.

It's called "Calorie King."

I remembered that when I read through this book, I realized the guy who started putting all this information 

together was passionate about making weight management easier.

So I went to their website.

Calorie King

I read through the information on the website, and did the 1 week free trial.

What was there to lose (besides 45 pounds???)

I immediately liked the user friendliness of the program and ALL the tremendous information they give you.

I liked that it was simply about learning how many calories your body needs every day, 

and then reducing that amount by several hundred (calories) to lose 1-2 pounds a week.

I liked that you have to learn that every morsel you put in your mouth has a calorie attached to it,

and to remember that amount, you must write it down.

I especially like that they said up front, "You don't HAVE to exercise to lose the weight."

I wasn't sure how I would fit exercise into my already overloaded daily routine.

I didn't want my weight loss to become the overriding obsession of my life to the point

that it impacted my time with my children and husband.

I didn't want them resenting that I was gone everyday for hours!

So I signed up.

And I followed it faithfully.

I recorded my calorie intake everyday in their online journal, weighed in once a week, and learned that with exercising you can eat a few more calories on that day.  

I started walking 30 minutes 3 days a week.

Then I bumped it up to 45 minutes for 4 days a week.

The first week I lost 5 pounds, then every week after that I lost 2 pounds....until about the fourth week.

That's when I ran into my first experience with the phenomenon known as:

the plateau!!

That is the infamous point in your weight loss journey that can occur over and over where you lose very little weight one week to no weight at all!!

Those are very frustrating weeks!!

I'll tell you more about what I learned through those times and how to "bust 'em"

in the next installment of this journey!!

Monday Fundays!!!

Last week my husband was gone all week to a conference that was several hours away in another big city.

Today, neither of us really had the energy or desire to pack up everybody and go do something.

So for today's "Monday Funday" we had a stay-at-home game-day.

Games are a great way to practice with your children certain
math skills, reasoning skills, vocabulary skills,
how to take turns, be accepting of each others differences,
 and self-control among other critical social skills.

Here are a few of our family's favorites: